Have you ever heard of the mother wound? If not, what is it? By the end of this post, I will explore the mother wound.
The mother wound is defined as the pain of being a woman passed down through generations of women in patriarchal cultures. Many people may have never heard of the mother wound. Subsequently, I was introduced to the mother wound through my acupunturist and it certaintly gave a me a perspective I desperetly needed.
Below is how the Mother Wound Manifests:
- Not able to be your full self, because you don’t want to threaten others.
- Having a high tolerance for poor treatment from others.
- Emotional care-taking.
- Feeling competitive with other women.
- Being overly rigid and dominating.
- Eating disorders, depression and addictions
*Definition taken from Bethany Webster site, “Mother Wound Healing: Why It’s Crucial For Women”
The first relationship we have is with our mother. She is your first home, first caretaker, and entry into this world. This relationship sets the tone for the foundation of your relationships and self-image. Moreover, if the relationship with our mother is not nurtured with genuine love and support, it could have a negative impact on out other relationships.
My Relationship with my Mother
For the most part, growing up I hardly felt geniune love and closeness from my mother. Additionally, she was very hard and critical of me without balancing it with tenderness. Not to sound all bad although she was not always great at giving guidance and support, she showed she cared in other ways. But in all, I desperatedly needed her encouragement and attention to have the confidence to securely walk in this world. The insecurity and indecision made me always second guess myself and abilities. This also created a need to constanly require reassurance and approval from others for my decisions.
Through the ups and down, from my relationship with my mother I learned a few things on my own. I learned it is alright and important to trust myself and walk my own path. I also, don’t need anyone’s approval to make decisions.
More on how I grew to accept and understand my mother in the next blog.